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Each time I pick up the phone to check in with my mom who’s afflicted with Alzheimer’s, she's more and more distant, more gone, more out there--while maintaining the sharp tongue and her wicked way with words which made her a particular favorite with my friends along the way.
Last night I caught up with the very current going’s on with her mom and dad, her sister, and her brother-in-law, all of whom have been dead for many, many years now. They had just been by the house, they say hello, etc.
But alas, now her sister isn’t talking to her for some reason mom couldn’t quite put her finger on. I didn’t have the heart to tell her it’s because she’s been gone for oh, 15 years now?
Having been adopted myself, my sister long gone, my dad having passed away, and mom in her condition, it suddenly hit me that I’m the sole bearer of the life and times.
And having been adopted, despite the love from very real and involved parents, I/you/we long for the twinge of any semblance of self reflected in someone’s face or gestures. The genetic twist that reveals--you’re FROM someplace.